So many times, in my coaching career and in my conversations with my friends I have heard phrases like:

“Why can’t she/he just get over it”

“He/she should be stronger”

“It’s not that big of a deal”

I can’t tell you how much it hurts me to hear those phrases. Feelings are not light switches that are easily turned on and off. Though for some people they are easier to navigate, for a lot of people, feelings have their own time frame.

Think of feelings as tunnels we pass through. Some people race through them focusing on the light at the end (Runners) while others walk it with a friend or a group of friends and let the distractions of conversations move them to the end (Walkers).

There is however another group, a highly sensitive group who walk the tunnel and sometimes crawl it while carrying bags of unresolved issues carried form other tunnels of feelings (Carriers).

I want you to put yourself in the shoes of Carrier and imagine being weighed down by heavy backpacks, watching people run or walk by, some with a friend or a group of friends.

Try to feel how they would feel by comments like: “Just get up and walk or why are you so slow”